I love you

I love you.  For who you are and what you make me feel.
You may not be the norm and what everyone else considered 'hot' or 'sexy'. But neither am I.
We're like two peas in a pod and we go together. You're exactly what I've been looking for.
You make me feel like a princess and put that smile on my face, even when the last thing I want to be doing is smiling. You're my best friend. I'm me when I'm with you. All my walls come down and I'm left bare with no protection, because you are my protection. You're my shelter from stormy seas and your arms are the ones I long to be held by. When you're holding me no one can hurt me.

You're part of me. You see me for who I am, not want I pretend to be. You make me oh so happy and without you I would be lonely. When I feel like no one gives a damn, you show me that you care. You've proven to me so many times that you're there for me, and I thank you for all the times you've made me feel better. I love you so much and I don't want to lose you. You are the best anyone could ever have.

These last two years have been amazing, and I hope we have so many more to come. Because I'm never letting you go.

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Woaah. Long time no post, had so much going on, had my maths exam on Tuesday. Easier than I thought it would be. And I have my English tomorrow, got to write a film review for Baz Luhrmann's Romeo and Juliet.

I've really been quite low for the last few weeks to be honest, so I'm going to take the time to apologise for the really depressing posts. It's just my friends aren't being so friendly at the moment. Let's just say 'Fucking Perfect' By Pink is the song that really means a lot to me at the moment.

My friends are just constantly picking at me. About every little fucking thing I do. If I talk to the boys who hang around with us for a while and then go over to them I get the whole Oh My Gosh Hannah Is Actually Talking To Us scenario. I said to them today 'Why do you always say that?'. All I got was 'You never stand with us'. I said 'Yes I do', but all I wanted to scream was 'You think I'm wrong? All you do is make me feel like shit because all you do is pick at me. I can't do anything fucking right by you lot, you make me so insecure, you make me feel like such a bad friend when all I do is try to be a good friend. And this is how you fucking make me feel. Thanks a bunch, you guys are real good 'friends'.

I didn't though, as angry as I am I really can't be doing with the arguments. My life is messed up enough as it is, I don't need an argument on top of it all. So I just turned to my friend who hadn't said anything and started fiddling with her hair.

I'm just so fed up of all the snide remarks. I understand the boys doing it, they're immature and don't know any better. But my girl mates just do it to be bitchy. They wonder why I don't stand with them. The boys aren't as bitchy as they are.

I'm sorry that I'm always complaining in my blog posts. I just feel so alone and so upset that this is the only place where I can post without being judged and sniped at. The only place I feel understood. I feel better sharing my life and feelings with complete strangers.  And I also apologise for the swearing, I'm just so angry and upset that I convey my anger through swear words. So I'm sorry.

I just can't be doing with this shit anymore.